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Feb 14 2011

Loose ends; from life in the slow lane

Interested readers ( actually, less than a dozen ) have inquiries about prior entries that deserve attention. From folk art & pornography, Jay L., NY, asked about a reference, the VW Beetles buried nose down in NM, and I could not recall where they were located.  What I did find was a photo taken, dated March 24, 2009, shortly before 1 PM, MST.  I assumed it was in NM while headed back to the midwest.  If you know the location, get back to me.

dscn2534.JPG

 Fasten your seat belt, six VW’s a quart low on Krylon 

In Life as Paperboys, three budding writers asked the identity of  the author of a dozen popular novels which had been carefully cloaked in a layer of gauze.  They were evidently seeking publishing advice.   Although to my knowledge the writer has no outstanding warrants, his identity will not be revealed for two reasons:

  1. He is armed with a .357 magnum
  2. I do not have a kevlar vest

The issue titled Motel Hell and Vanna White created some fun and discomfort:

  • rbb in RI; thanks for your loyalty, but you need to join the 21st century, learn to bookmark on the family computer, and throw away your so 1970s Rolodex file
  • jmb in CO; if you decide to cull out your closet of elegant couture, I want first dibs before you go to St. Vincent de Paul, Salvation Army, or the Buffalo Exchange
  • bdoyle in CA; advancing age has caused a < in testosterone, resulting in a shrinkage of certain male components and a concomitant > in estrogen.  For next year’s physical we plan to add a Pap smear and a mammogram to the finger pointing ritual
  • iflash in AZ; DeTour is Patagonia in drag (or is it the other way around…..?)
  • jk in MI; how fragile it is to go “down under”, being a faux transvestite and at the same time a genuine Yooper.  If the Cubs make it to the World series, I plan to dress sweeter than Lady Godiva for game seven.
  • ge in CA; we could be a couple, dazzling the doyennes of the GWG convention as drag kings.  You can be Mrs. Doubtfire.  I always felt that Tootsie was miscast when Sidney Pollack (a native of South Bend, IN) picked Dustin Hoffman over me.
  • 220px-tootsie_imp.jpg
  • gopio in NY; your subtle hint at lawyering is offensive.  Just get me a clean room.  My response, in Hindi, below*
  • bj in WY; sorry, but I was an unpopular geek in high school, and according to wife Lynn, still am.

The biggest disappointment, however; Vanna, why won’t you return my calls ?dscn1511.JPGdscn1525.JPG

 Me and Jack, backseat driving at the best tourist trap north of the 45th parallel

**ہیں۔ انہیں ضمیر اور عقل ودیعت ہوئی ہی۔, roughly translated, “bite me”

Written by InsightOut · Categorized: musings, unraveling

Comments

  1. Bill D. says

    February 14, 2011 at 10:54 am

    Thanks for your updated illuminations.

    Perhaps sending Vanna an email Valentine’s Day greeting may get a response…

    Happy Valentine’s Day!

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Valentine%27s_Day

  2. rosich.v.m. says

    February 16, 2011 at 8:30 am

    Thanks for the valentine and the birthday greeting.

    If you ever unblock your phone, I’ll call.

  3. Gary Estep says

    February 21, 2011 at 2:19 pm

    Chas, you are a very, very sick man. And we love you for it.
    Gary and Julie!!

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